Bonjour tout le monde. Je suis desole pour ce que tu vas lire. Sometimes I gotta stunt that I took 2 years of French in college. Your boy was eager to show off his Italian in the Italy preview, but due to unforeseen circumstances, you will not get that pleasure of reading poorly grammarized Italian. Instead, you will get French, and you will like it! Especially the way France has turned itself around, you will wish that you were a Frenchman; Because this team is no joke. Seriously, if there is anyone that should be optimistic about the future state of their national team, it’s France. With young superstars like Kylian Mbappe, Ousman Dembele, Anthony Martial and Paul Pogba, the French will be drinking wine from sun-up to sun-down this summer. Although if we’re being honest, they probably already do that so, they may pop open a brand-new expensive bottle.
At 6 to 1 odds of winning PutinMania 18, France may have the best betting value this summer. Aside from being young and eager to win, France has tons of veteran players like Lloris, Griezmann, Matuidi, Koscielny, and that handsome fellow that all the girls clamor for. With his sexy hair, perfectly chiseled face, and oddly spelled name. What? No, not Olivier Giroud. I’m talking Franck Ribery. You know every girl wants a man with a badass scar.
But enough talk about great looking dudes, let’s get back to talking about balls. Soccer balls that is. Because you came here for one thing, and one thing only, and that’s to laugh at the players that I will incorrectly predict to play in Russia. So let’s get to it.
Goalkeepers
Hugo Lloris, Alphonse Areola, Steve Mandanda.
There aren’t many keepers on the planet that would call elite. Hugo Lloris is elite. With 2 World Cups under his belt, Lloris will captain this team to what will probably be a top 5 finish. So long as he’s healthy, nobody will expect anyone else in goal.
Defense
Laurent Koscielny, Raphaël Varane, Samuel Umtiti, Lucas Digne, Aymeric, Laporte, Layvin Kurzawa, Benjamin Mendy, Djibril Sidibe,
Hold up. Wait a minute. France isn’t really known for defending, (see WWII). But this backline is very solid. Assuming that Benjamin Mendy has a full recovery, although 6 month return from an ACL seems a bit early, s/o Derrick Rose, the French defense will be more than a top tier defense. Especially with Lloris being the final defense.
Midfielders
N’golo Kante, Adrien Rabiot, Paul Pogba, Corentin Tolisso, Blaise Matuidi, Thomas Lemar,
If you were to take a look at the players that did not make the midfielders list, you will cry knowing that on its best day, none of your national team players would make a reserve squad for France. The depth in the midfield is outrageous. Players like N’Zonzi, Coquelin, Sissoko, Ben Arfa, Bakayoko and more missed out on this team. To think 4 years ago, this team stunk.
Forwards
Kylian Mbappé, Ousmane Dembele, Anthony Martial, Antoine Griezmann, Alexandre Lacazette, Olivier Giroud.
Another deep deep position. Players like Fekir, Thauvin, Payet, Benzema, Gignac, Coman, and more all desperately deserve to go to Russia. Unfortunately, only 23 players can part take. Remember when the US didn’t make the World Cup, and there were talks of a World Cup NIT tournament. I say let them do it, solely for the list of players that deserve to be in Russia and won’t be there. France and Germany C teams vs US A/B team. Would be an interesting watch.
There you have it folks. France is a super team, and love cheese and crackers is basically the sum up of the blog. Truly is sad for those that don’t make it. Players that work there ass off, and have quality games, only to be shown up by once in a generation talents. Sad. See you next time where I’ll go over, (blank). ‘Til then tweet me how badly I screwed this prediction up @SenorBautista. Enjoy some Zinedine Zidane France highlights, deuces.
[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9nxRmckVueY]