NWSL: A Blog For People That Don’t Really Know The League

/ American Soccer, NWSL / By

Welcome in, stranger. I see you’ve wandered into the weird part of the internet again. Well, this is a disclaimer to what you’re about to read. I am no expert on the league. In fact, I’d probably seek 100 other blogs before coming here. But there is no paywall so there’s that. If that doesn’t make you run for the hills from this blog, I guess nothing will so enjoy the ride.

I won’t bore you with the details of the league and how it’s structured. And I certainly won’t mention that fake “draw” that the NWSL had which was not worse than the one MLS had, but still totally not believable. I will mention that we lost a good one along the way. I’m sure you’ve read up on the disaster that occurred in Orlando. Judging by social media you’d swear it’s the soccer equivalent of Chernobyl (great HBO series btw).

I’m actually not sure where to go with this blog. I guess it’s an Idiot’s Guide equivalent for the NWSL. Except this was written by another Idiot. Deeming this, “An Idiot’s Guide for The NWSL, Written by an Idiot.”

Chicago Red Stars

Maybe it’s my bias of living in Chicago, but I feel that the Red Stars are like that model team every expansion team should follow. They draft well, go after big names, find local talent, and market really good on the interwebs. There is nothing not to like about this team. Except that their twitter handle is not @ChicagoRedStars. That and they are cursed by Carli Lloyd.

Everywhere she has gone has only resulted in bad news for that team’s future. And in this case, the Red Stars are just stuck in that soccer hell of being good but not lucky enough to win a championship. They are the Los Angeles Dodgers of the NWSL. Always good enough to play in the semi’s, possibly the finals, but whoops, somehow something went wrong.

They have the names, Ertz, Naeher, Brian, Nagasato, Watt, and more. Why they could win? Time… Even the Cubs won a championship. Anything will happen that can. Maybe 2020 means Chicago can finally win.

Houston Dash

A team with hopes, dreams, the potential of big money backing, and well a shit history. But history is meant to be broken, and very technically, the Houston Dash already eclipsed their first “playoff” match this year. And all bets are off in a playoff game.

As much as we all want to give hope for Houston’s future, their past has been just so bad that you can’t ignore it. This team isn’t spring chicken. This will be season/tournament 6 for them. But fear not, they’ve had an offseason as good as any, expectations from outside aren’t high but this team might be the grittiest in the league. Respect the Dash this season.

North Carolina Courage

The New England Patriots. That’s all. Annoyingly good. Everyone hates them. They’re the New England Patriots. Except they didn’t lose Tom Brady. Also, their uniforms stink.

OL Reign

Honestly, no team has frustrated me more than the OL Seattle Tacoma Reign FC. This team has all the potential of being the most popular and most talented team. The Seattle Sounders has 40 thousand strong backing them up at CenturyLink Field. The lack of proper backing of the team has led to them bouncing around Seattle Washington-Area numerous times.

But 2020 could be the start of something beautiful. A team as talented as they come with new ownership in French Olympic Lyon, they are ready to start their path to being NWSL’s most successful team? They got the stars to win. Now a vision needs to be in place to see it through, some might have wished it was still Vlatko doing it but, oh well.

Orlando Pride

Just because they’re not in the tournament, doesn’t mean I can’t talk about them. I would argue Orlando was the most interesting team to follow this tournament. A great roster overhaul. They strengthened their defense. They got healthy. I loved Orlando’s chances this tournament, and it sucks they won’t be playing.

P.s I think they totally would’ve beaten NCC.

Portland Thorns

I hate the Portland Thorns but not in a rivalry way. I’m more-so jealous that they have their shit together. They’re the most respected team in the league. Think Red Stars, but with 25 thousand plus at every home game.

No one can deny how talented this team is. They went out and added some rookies that are gonna tear up the league. They already had Lindsey Horan, Tobin Heath, and then traded for Becky Sauerbrunn. Oh, and no big deal they have Christine Sinclair. No other human on this earth, and beyond the grave, has scored more international goals than her.

I was high on Portland winning the title this year. And then their goalie Adrianna Franch got injured and I’m worried about them. But, the 10 players ahead of whoever is in goal are too good for them not to compete. Be very afraid of Portland this year.

Sky Blue FC

What can I say about Sky Blue FC that won’t offend the masses? I really do love what Alyse Lahue and the rest of the staff has done in reinvigorating the team. This team was dead, more than 6 feet under, and they turned the ship around fast.

Sky Blue is gonna be the team everyone wants to see do well. Now I mentioned I’m no expert. In fact, I’m probably a few IQ points away from being classified as a Chimp, but if your two superstar forwards are gonna be out with injuries, the path to a championship is a fucking tough one. For as much change as they’ve gone through, I just can’t see them winning a championship. That being said, I love their jerseys.

Utah Royals

The hosts of the tournament. A team that almost, I repeat, almost had the best offseason of the league. But Corona fucked it up for Utah, and now they go into the tournament with no Bouhaddi or Marozsan (both European ballers). Oh, and Christen Press won’t play either so… Utah Royals are gonna have to RE-Imagine that starting lineup. Good luck Utah!

Washington Spirit

I think I speak for everyone when I say, HOLY VALUE! This team is may be the big question mark of the tournament. Are they ready to compete for a championship? But are they REALLY?

This is a young team. And with youth comes a few perks. Energized, eager to play, ready to prove themselves, not old enough to go out to bars in the middle of a pandemic. The negatives to youth… experience? I don’t think this applies to this team. I’m super excited to see them potentially win this league. Also, Rose Lavelle is the LOML both on the field and off it.

That’s it. I won’t make you suffer any longer. Going to start on my predictions blog, which in itself will be a disaster. Also, my local sportsbook has NWSL lines so peep my twitter (@SnacksBautista) to fade my picks and make yourself some money. Later.

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